Day 87: fire and rain

October 14^th 2009

5 and a half years later

im still looking for enough piece to fill this puzzle with

I am afraid only ash still remains

I am still looking for things to fill the space with

There is still a whole in my sister heart the size of a 7 year old best friend

I wonder with each birthday if she cries in honor of one missed by jasmine

I’ve got no more space for pain

So im throwing questions to demons I have forgotten to pray to

To make room for the suffereing to settle

Locked door

Fire

Silence

Ringing

Love

Buzzing

Broken

Heaven

Together

Survival

A father Left alone

Husban

mother

How does it feel to be god?

Did you find 2 daughters

burning bedside prayers

sending smoke signals to angels

these girls are still babys

too young to grow wings

what will become of their undeveloped dreams

will they receive a halo to lynch every nighmare with

jesus

will you welcome these girls to your gates

only to leave there mother at the bus stop

regardless of whether or not she screamed prayers of forgiveness into your flame

burning bushes of commandments

tho salt not kill

but she killed them anyway

is it murder

if its done to take away the pain

is it still wrong if she cried every night looking for another way

another answer

did she not cry hard enough

What does you heaven look like

Can you taste silence on the tip of your tongue forming a smile

Can you feel our tears like raindrops on your back when we cry for you to come home

Have you remembered how much you loved the rain before it drove you to side with flame?