Day 798: water

you are water
i love you
but i cannot hold you
i know you
only by the way you fall through me
wash over me
in episodes
like waves
only in the way i know you absences leaves me
dry and pulled
like gravity
like a tide
somehow controlled by a moon
but most nights
it is too foggy in san fransisco to see anything but black
the seasons are changing
the only good that will bring is rain
more water to remind me of how iʻve failed to keep every single one of my promises
to every single one of my hearts
how they are strung across this country like lanterns
a constant reminder of how thin iʻve been stretched
how resistant i am to planting roots
how every time iʻve tried
iʻve been planted too deep for anyone to see me glowing still