day 580: whitwash

I do not know how long it has been since I have spoken a word of Hawaiian. However long since we last found each other lucky enough to be on either end of the telephone line. But I do know that the words fall out of my mouth like white wash. Its foams at the edges and slips through my fingertips- I have forgotten how to hold right. Something I am remembering- but it is painful to be reminded of all that I have forgotten in just a few short months away from the islands. I try to dismiss all of this from my head. I have already spent enough time crying and missing home- now I am home, there is no reason to let such a waste of salt continue.