Saturday, March 13, 2010

day 235: retunring

it is cold
the smell
and unpleasant
the man beside me has harry arms
crocked teeth
he is unpleasant to touch
it is all unpleasant
i am tired
haven't slept well in months
but this seat is uncomfortable
unpleasant if you will
i am going home
the only way i know how
with dry tear ducts
an open heart
and a suitcase full of expectations
my baggage is heavy
walking this way is uncomfortable
i've got my music on my back
i wish i could play and sing and walk and carry myself to the curb
but i cannot
i go to the gym daily
but i am weaker than i have ever been
my bones are torn
it is painful most days
to exist
this way
i eat only when i am in pain
love only when i am drunk
or optimistic
it feels the same
my arms are open
i am retunring
the feeling in my stomach is less than unpleasant
but its good to be home

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