Friday, July 1, 2011

Day 712: cant

"the only way for a heart to grow is to break and rebuild"
but i'm not sure if there's any more room in my chest.
tell me how to shrink you away.
til you are hollow casing.
a space just to carry the echoes of what
once lived and breathed

you are a promise i left stiched to the back of my throat
so every song i sang
tasted like you lips
these are the parts of you i cannot shake from my skin
how every time someone touches my hair
i think of how you do it better
every time i strum my guitar i wonder
will i have to sell her
down the river
to the highest bidder
i need her body as far away from my fingertips
i cannot love any piece of you
anything you have touched
not if you are running
breaking time and distance
not if you are gone
not if you arent screaming the same songs
cursing all the gods that brought us to the same intersection
not if you are walking upright
not if you arent reaching out your hand
not if you arent going to be there
at the end of the tunnel
not if its not you
not if its not me
not if we are not the ones crashing into each others destiny
not if we are just bypass
a step in the latter
a place we wait for things to get better
not if you are taking my confidence with you
and every part of me i've learned to love through your body
not if all that is gone
not if all i am is gone
not if all i am is gone

forget how we said forever
forget how you asked me to be somewhere i wasnt
forget how maybe i didnt try hard enough
forget how i failed you
forget how everything crumbled
forget how i pushed you
forget how we began
forget all the kisses
forget holding hands
forget how my skin shakes in you presence
forget how
forget how we loved
forget what it means
forget my body
every last whisper
every last line
forget the ones that havent come yet
forget the broken promises
forget the unborn children
the dogs and the yard
the things i let myself dream of
forget the way we cried
forget the day i was born
the rings we carry
all the stories
throw them to texas
ask someone to burn them

cuz i dont know how to be anything but yours
and youll tell me everything about that is wrong
and unhealthy
but all i am is pieces of a woman you somehow put back together
so no
i dont know how to say im single without your fingertips pulling at the back of my vocal chords
dont know how to tell
dont know how to speak
dont know how to make new plans
cant be in your city
cant hear your voice
cant know your name
cant breathe
cant breathe
cant breathe
cant breathe
cant breathe
cant breathe
if you arent here


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